What have I done for me lately?











{July 11, 2009}   I’m Clueless

Yeah, I have no idea what’s going on with 6′4″.  There were a few days this week where I didn’t talk to him a whole lot…and I started thinking that maybe this long-distance, seeing each other once a week just couldn’t work.  But just as I start to detach, he’s back.  So, I’m hanging in there, but still have no idea where this is going or where I really want it to go.  I do like him.  And I am attracted to him…a lot.  But who knows.

And I had another a-ha moment.  When GI Joe and I were hanging out…and he just couldn’t make a move, I always wondered if it was me or him putting up the resistance.  But I finally realized what it was.  He thought he was going to be deployed, but he didn’t know when.  So why would you let yourself get close to someone, knowing you’d be leaving.  That’s logical.  So I asked him about it yesterday…and it was actually a decent conversation.  ….and then I started wondering what if?  I did like him…hmm.

WHO KNOWS!!!!



I’ll admit, sometimes I’m not the best listener.  Sometimes I’ll move on to the next conversation and then go, “Wait, what did he just say?”  This has been the case twice with 6′4″. We’ll be talking on the phone, all is well, making plans, whatever and as we’re saying goodbye, there have been two times that he mumbled something.

I think he said “Love you.”

Wait, what?  I’m sure it doesn’t help that my response has been, “Okay, talk to you later.”  Doh.

I did have an experience this week where I talked him and a few minutes after we got off the phone, I stopped and was just in awe of how much I care about him.  Not quite ready to drop that L bomb, but I do care deeply though.

I guess I’ll just try to listen better and maybe I’ll actually be able to verify that the L word is part of our conversations…and maybe someday soon I’ll be able to say it back.



{June 15, 2009}   The ‘Scopes

Whenever I’m in a new relationship, I like to check out our astrological compatibility just to see what it says. Now, there’s only one sign in the zodiac that I’ve avoided because I now how incompatible we can be. Taurus. So of course, what we resist, persists.  6′4″ is a Taurus. Here’s the scoop:

Even though there’s a hard square here, creating a giant red flag, the many Leo-Taurus couples prove that some prefer the path of most resistance. When first dating, Leo enjoys being the prize possession of the Bull, who shows love with trinkets and advice. Both are uninhibited pleasure-seekers, making sex the glue, and the catharsis for relationship frustrations. High-spirited Leo helps Taurus cast off its cloak of reserve, and indulge in the moment. Taurus prods Leo to put their wildest dreams into tangible reality.

Further into the relationship, they’ll discover that what doesn’t kill their bond, makes it stronger. Here you have two notoriously stubborn types, and there are showdowns throughout this relationship. Tensions flare with Leo gets haughty and Taurus pretends not to care. When Leo feels consistently dissed, like their needs don’t matter, it can become a fundamental problem. Taurus finds Leo demanding, and taxing on their mellow nature. Here’s a couple that may argue all the time, but still end up side-by-side in rockers on the porch. It doesn’t always work, but friction can be a refining force in relationships, too. It’s love with an edge, and that keeps them wedged in for life.

Well, I can’t really argue with any of that!  We do argue all the time – not seriously, but we argue.  Interesting since in my last major relationship, we NEVER argued…maybe he argued with his other girlfriend.  Who knows.  Anyway, I think knowing how to argue is an important part of a relationship…we’ve got that. 

And he is pushing me to attain all of my wildest dreams…it’s weird, but he’s already made some observations that opened my eyes.  He is bizarre and he gets on my nerves sometimes, but somehow, I feel myself falling for him very quickly.  I’m hoping the net that catches me looks like a hammock on the beach…and that he’s right by my side…with all of his stubbornness and inflexibility right there with us.



{June 15, 2009}   Welcome To The Family

My family is amazing. For the most part, we all get along, we all have a great time together and I appreciate their love and support. In my dating life, my family has met quite a few of the men I’ve been with. They’re honest, yet supportive – and of course, love to tease me asking “WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?” after it’s over. Love you guys for that!

So, with 6′4″ new guy (6′4″ for short), we’ve been together two weeks. And I just found out that my family has scheduled a get together on the 28th. Now, 6′4″ usually (ha – after two weeks, we already have a usually?) has his daughter on Saturdays, and maybe Friday nights. But the 28th is a Sunday. I’ve spent the last 3 Sundays with him, so in theory, he’d be available to attend the family dinner. And in theory, if he wants to see me, he’d have to go to the family dinner. Hmm.

Because my family is so welcoming, I would feel comfortable letting them meet him, but is HE ready for that? I tend not to waste any time in rthe beginning of elationships and I think it’s because I’m a pretty good judge of whether I could be a with a guy when I first meet him. (Of course ending a relationships take a tad bit longer for me.) And after the feeling that I could be with a guy, I seem to just let nature take its course and go from there. 6′4″ has already mentioned marriage and kids – and we even talked about him meeting my dad which is a big deal since my dad has only met one person I’ve dated. So is it THAT big of a deal for him to meet my family?

I’ll ask him next weekend, but it could be time for him to meet my peeps. Yowza!



{June 9, 2009}   My Man

Out of obligation, I went out with Bachelor #2 again today. He took me to Panda Express. Uh huh. He’s very complimentary and doesn’t hesitate to tell me how attracted he is to me. And don’t get me wrong, he’s good looking with a decent body, but I just don’t think he’s right for me.

But while I was having lunch with #2, I got a text from #1…the details don’t matter, but he said, “How would you feel about getting YOUR MAN blah, blah, blah.” Wait. MY MAN? Hmm.

Is he my man?

Interestingly enough, I do think he is.

Weird. I have a man. My man. Whoa.



{June 9, 2009}   Moving Along

No final decision between Bachelor #1 and Bachelor #2 yet, although, I get the feeling that I know where this is going. See if you can tell my thoughts on the subject as well:

1. Canceled on #2 in order to hang out with #1 on Friday night.
2. #1 spent the night.
3. Saw #1 on Sunday as well and REALLY had a good time with him…with our clothes on!
4. Have scheduled to see Bachelor #2 during the day tomorrow as not to create a romantic setting. Lunch works just fine.
5. Am not excited about lunch tomorrow – yet, I still feel like I need to see him one more time just to be sure.

But I think I am sure. Bachelor #1 is growing on me…I really do like the kids. And it’s been A LONG TIME since I’ve actuallly liked someone. It’s a good feeling!



{June 5, 2009}   The Musk

Yep, I’ve got it.

When I was an intern just out of college, we had a boss who must’ve been 143 years old and was a crabby old man. He sought to teach us about the industry, but also maybe a little about life here and there. He used to talk about “the musk” and how when women get it, no man can resist.

After my 2 dates last weekend, I’ve also been asked out by one of our IT guys. He’s a nice guy, but not so much my type. I’ve also been told that this guy I’ve talked to (but never met) on and off for 3 years NEEDS to meet me now. And finally, JC called last night and wanted to watch the game together. It was weird and out of character, but we still had fun.

I finally understand how powerful the musk can be!! I promise I will use my musk for good and not evil…but in the meantime…have a second date with Bachelor #2 this evening and a second date with Bachelor #1 (the frontrunner) on Sunday.

And somewhere in the between, I think I deserve a really good nap! This is tiring!!!



{June 2, 2009}   The Life of a Playa

Oh Lord, how do I get myself into these things? I’ve had 2 dates in the past 2 days. Just to recap:

Bachelor #1: A lot in common – he makes me laugh and he’s goofy just like me! I’m VERY attracted to him – 6′4″, kind of light skinned, gorgeous eyes. We intended on having a meal together and 7 hours later he left. Yes, I’m guilty of letting it go too far…but I don’t have any regrets! He wanted to come see me tonight too, but I was out with Bachelor #2…had I known that, I probably would’ve canceled.

Bachelor #2: He works in an industry I’d like to be in and in fact, asked me to participate in a program he’s putting together. Career change?? WOO HOO! Yes, he’s attractive, but he’s probably 5′9″ on the roster and I didn’t have that spark I had with Bachelor #1. I kissed him a peck goodnight, but that’s it. We do have plans to get together Friday night though too…we’ll see what happens then.

They both seem to really be into me and both are very free with the compliments. Both have kid(s), but I’m not sure how many or how old #2’s kids are. I think at this point, I really need to give both of them a chance, although I do have a rule that I’ve always abided by. I think it comes from watching too much baby daddy drama on Maury, but if somewhere along the way there’s a birth control failure, I just don’t want to have to wonder who’s kid it is…so for this month, I’m already committed to Bachelor #1.

Seriously, apparently it’s feast or famine with me!!



{May 20, 2009}   New Opportunities

In a few weeks, I just might have a new job. WHOOOOO HOOO! It’s in the same industry I’m trying to get rid of, but this position would allow me to be a lot more creative than I get to be now. I really am looking at it as a temporary solution, but anything is better than where I am now, so I’ll take a step up, however small that step is. Plus I’d get to work with some cool peeps, including my old boss…and if all goes well, the one girl I like that I work with now. We didn’t talk money, but when I told him what I make, he said, “Well, that’s not unrealistic.” Oh did I say thousand? I mean million. Doh.

Best of all I can’t wait to tell my current boss to suck it. Might just be my best moment in the last 2 ½ years here. I’ve dreamt of telling her that many times…especially as she’s talking to me, or looking at me, or even existing on the same planet as me…but now I get to do it for reals this time. Love it.

Another thing I’m excited about is the location of the new position. It’s in a more populated area – where I could walk to get lunch and meet new people galore. Like men people? Like hot professional men people? Grr. Hey, do you mean my chances of actually having a social life could increase? Dude, sign me up!

Anyway, so there’s a potential bright spot on the horizon…keep hope alive!



I just really can’t pretend I’m turned on by a guy I’m not attracted to. And if the idea of kissing him makes me throw up in my mouth, no amount of money can make me do it.

So, new homeboy got denied last night. Tyra would say he takes a really good picture, but just doesn’t have that sparkle in person. Maybe it was the lisp. Maybe it was the creepy way he undressed me with his eyes. Or maybe it was the way he tried to talk about things he knew nothing about (sports.)

But yeah, he’s not the one for me. I do wish him the best in finding what he’s looking for. And I wish me the best too…but somehow I’m skeptical. Hate that.



et cetera